Taking the Binkie away
Any suggestions / techniques on how to take my son's binkie away? And what age should I do it? I am due with my second next month, so he will also be making a transition to a big boy bed in a couple of months. I am scared of too much change all at once. Or am I over reacting?
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Michael P. Carson, MD on -
As a parent, I think there is no single answer here. It depends on the kid, but this week my brother in law had the same experience that I did with my son (back in the day). We did it at around 2. My brother in law did it around 1 1/2 years with his daughter. That first night we wanted to call the Betty Ford Clinic for him. I think you just gotta make your decision, expect a bad first night, and go with it.
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Permalink Reply by Angie Hoffman on -
Did you and your brother in law take it away "cold turkey" or should I try and phase it out. He uses it when he sleeps (naps and night) but if he is tired (whether we are home or out) he asks for it.
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Permalink Reply by Michael P. Carson, MD on
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Went cold turkey. Really, he'll be OK. If you think this is the time, then do it. We always joke that our kids will blame us for things no matter what we do (I have a teenage daughter, so I know), but this won't scar him for life. It'll be harder for you than him. There is no book on this, no research, no internet website with made up data.It's just a parenting decision. He'll be fine.
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Permalink Reply by stacy buono on -
I wouldn't change too much right before the new baby. We didn't get rid of the binkie with my son until his 3rd birthday. For months prior we talked about how it would be time after his birthday party to give it up. Then, we left it (actually all of them!) on a big rock in our backyard for the binkie fairy to take to the other babies. In the morning, they were all gone and there was a big boy gift and note from the fairy. That did the trick, never asked for binkie again, not once.
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Permalink Reply by Debbie T on -
I did the Bobo (pacifier) fairy. We traded the Bobo's for Barbies. I have twin girls and they were 3. We had some tough nights at first. I would wait to take it away since you are due soon and he will have too much to transition. The baby, new bed, etc. I would wait a couple of months after the baby is born. Good luck!
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Permalink Reply by Angie Hoffman on
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Thanks so much! My son just turned 2 and I don't think he will understand the Binkie Fairy yet. Sounds like I should wait until after the baby anyway. He might be able to do it now, but I think it will be a lot easier on me if we wait!
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Permalink Reply by Stacey Crew on -
My daughters are two years and 8 months apart. When my second one arrived, we had just about fully potty trained our first. With the arrival of the new baby, my oldest had some set back with the potty training. It could have been an attention seeking because I clearly remember her standing in the middle of the living room, spreading her legs and, well, you know. All while I was holding the new baby.
I think there are two schools of thought on transitions. Do them all at once, or one at a time. As far as the binkie, we did it gradually, got down to one (from 2 or 3), limited it to certain times of the day, and then offered it up to the binkie fairies. There was a lot of encouragement that she was a big girl and how she was doing so well without the binkie. Like any other transition, it took a little time, but we all got through it!
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Permalink Reply by Brandi Best on -
Angie with all of mine that were passy babies I just waited until they were ready to give it up. None of mine kept it past 2 1/2 though. And that was my middle son who faced having twin bros when he was just 17 months. We would slowly try and ween him, but we never forced him. When he hit 2 we started taking it away during the day and would only let him have it for nap and bedtime. Soon he was not asking for it at nap, and then one day he just didn't even go looking for it anymore.
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Permalink Reply by Angie Hoffman on
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Thanks everyone. I took it away several weeks ago. One (frustrating) night I couldn't find any at bed time and I just said binkies went bye bye... and that was it. He didn't cry and has hardly even asked for them. Honestly I am surprised it was that easy for as much as he was attached to them. He doesn't even have a problem with my infant daughter having hers. Thanks again!
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Permalink Reply by Cristie Ritz King on -
I'm no expert so maybe there will be some disputing this, but I know my kids were similarly spaced apart as yours and there was no way I was taking away that binkie when there was a new bed and a new sibling to contend with.:) My oldest gave it up on her third birthday and my Middle one was closer to four. My youngest never used one (the horror!).
We had a "pacifier fairy" who came and took it in the middle of the night to give to new babies. Quite a story I know but we used it on the first one and she passed it on to her brother. They were each allowed to go pick out a "Big Kid" toy in exchange for being so brave. It worked with both kids like a charm. I will say, as soon as they were mobile, we restricted the pacifier to cribs and car seats on long trips. I wasn't carrying it around with me and they never walked around with it in their mouths. It was only a sleep security thing. Good luck
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Permalink Reply by Cristie Ritz King on
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Ha! I just posted a reply to this and then all the other replies popped up-including yours Angie which said you'd already taken away the binkie. Not sure why this discussion is here in March when you posted in November! Oh well. Nothing like advice six months too late!!
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Permalink Reply by Angie Hoffman on
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Cristie, still great advice for the next one! Thanks!
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